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Leo Buscaglia's Big Mistake
I met Leo Buscaglia many years ago. He was the charming, passionate, and colorful author of the best-selling book, Love. He once said in a lecture, "I own the copyright on love!" He was a loveable man. His words warmed my heart and inspired my soul. Marian, my wife at the time, and I used to watch Leo on television. He inspired us. We were learning about tithing at the time. I was very skeptical. I still thought giving was a scheme. But Marian was always more open-minded and trusting than me. She practiced giving more than I did in those early years. One day, when Marian looked around to see who she was going to send money to, she easily remembered Leo Buscaglia. She wanted to thank him for all his sharing, and for reminding her through his books and talks to always live a life of love. So Marian found his address and sent him a check. I remember how happy she looked as she wrote him a note and mailed him the gift. Her heart was alive. But then something sad happened. A few weeks later, Marian received a letter from Leo Buscaglia. He had returned her check. He added a note that said he had plenty and didn't want or need more, so please give the check to someone in need. Marian was hurt. She was offended. She felt rejected. She saw the refusal of the gift as a dismissal of her. It was a sad moment. While we could talk about Marian's response to the letter she received, my point here is more about Leo's action. I think Leo made a mistake. In order to be in the flow of life, you must give as well as receive. Leo cut off the flow. Much later I learned --- from Leo himself --- that he had experienced several robberies. His house had been broken into and his belongings taken. It happened to him at least twice that I recall. I can't help but think Leo had inner blocks about receiving. Those blocks showed up in his outer world by losing all he had. I could be wrong, but I really wonder if there was a connection between his refusing gifts and losing what he had. Let's learn from Leo's mistake. When someone offers you money, accept it.
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Leo Buscaglias 犯的大错误
多年前，我遇见 Leo Buscaglias，他是个充满魅力、激情而且很有个性的作家， 畅销书《爱》的作者。他曾经在一次演讲时风趣地说，“我拥有爱的版权”。 他是一个可爱的人。他的话温暖着我的心，激励着我的灵魂。Marian （我当时的妻子）和我经常看 Leo 的电视节目。他激励着我们两人。 那个时候，我们都在学习“什一税”的有关理论。我对此非常怀疑，我总认为对布施的强调是种“阴谋”。但是 Marian 就不一样了，她思路非常开阔并对此理论完全相信。那几年里，她布施的远远多于我。 一天，Marian 正在寻找布施对象的时候，想到了 Leo。因为正是 Leo 的书和演讲启发着她去过一种充满爱的生活，Marian 一直就想感谢他。 因此，Marian 找到了他的地址，给他寄去了一张支票。我记得，当 Marian 做这些事的时候显得非常高兴。她的心充满活力。 后来有点不愉快的事情发生了。 几周后，Marian 收到了 Leo 的回信。他退回了支票，并附了一条说明，说他的钱正好够用了，因此希望她能把钱送给更需要的人。 Marian 感到被伤害，被冒犯，和被拒绝。她觉得如果对方不在乎她的礼物，就象不在乎她本人一样。那真是个伤心的时段。 虽然我们这里说的是 Marian 收到 Leo 回信时的反应，但我更想讨论的是 Leo 的行为。我认为他犯了一个错误。为了融入生活之流，你既需要布施，也需要接受。Leo 截断了这个生活之流。 后来我从 Leo 本人那里得知，大约在此事过后一段时间，他被盗了好几次。盗贼破门而入，偷走了不少东西。我记得这样的事至少发生过两次。 我不禁想到：Leo 在“接受”上有内在的障碍。这些障碍通过外在的“丢失”而展现出来。也可能我是错的，但我确实认为他丢东西和他拒绝接受礼物有一定的关系。 我们要从 Leo 的错误中吸取教训。 当有人布施金钱给你的时候，接受它。
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